Are you a writer? Congratulations, you Casanova!
Do you know a writer? Better hit them up – because it turns out they just might do it better.
As a writer, I have always hidden behind my writing. On the page, I am snarky, witty, funny, sassy, and outgoing – all things that I am definitely not in person. In fact, you could almost say that my written self is an alter ego, the person I’d like to be when I’m sitting home on a Friday night with some Häagen-Dazs in a keyboard in front of me.
As you can imagine, I never really thought that would translate to success in the bedroom. In fact, I would have imagined it was quite the opposite: my long, solitary hours in front of a computer probably weren’t doing anything to advance my love life.
(Due to the aforementioned introversion, I have not followed up with my romantic partners to assess this. Maybe I should.)
As it turns out, however, that may be the case: recent investigations may have found that writers have a particular set of skills, a set of skills that make them fantastic lovers in the bedroom.
recent investigations may have found that writers have a particular set of skills, a set of skills that make them fantastic lovers in the bedroom.
First off: it’s been widely known for a few years now that creative people not only spend more time in the sack, but have more fun there too. And that makes sense, of course – in fact, it makes so much sense that I’m kind of wondering why they had to do a scientific study to prove it.
I mean, no one looks at an accountant or lawyer with eyes of lustful abandon. The one that always grabs your attention is the moody method actor, or that dark tattooed artist, the one that seems to have the demons haunting him. Those are the ones that really get your blood rushing.
And for good reason: all the things we associate with the creative person are generally things that also translate to success in the bedroom. Creative people are imaginative, which generally leads to success in the bedroom because, let’s face it, the only time routine was ever sexy was in Victorian England when you always did for the queen or something.
They also tend to be sensual. For many creative souls, there is an ability that is a prerequisite for their creative work: the ability to lose themselves to the senses, to create and maintain a connection that is beyond the physical. That’s not something you’re going to get (or at least, something that you want to appear to get) from our dreadfully boring normal accountant or lawyer.
(Apologies to accountants and lawyers. I’m sure many of you are delightfully sexy people.)
But the interesting thing about that is that many of the qualities that creative people have are now being identified in writers. That’s not in and of itself surprising – after all, us writers are creative too, aren’t we? So it stands to reason that we have at least a little bit of that magic mojo at all the other creative types seem to have.
So it stands to reason that we have at least a little bit of that magic mojo at all the other creative types seem to have.
What is surprising, however, is that many other qualities identified in writers aren’t the kind of steamy qualities you’d expect when it comes to what makes a great lover. For example – writers are dedicated, focused, analytical, observant, and generally introverted. We’re also scientifically healthier mentally and physically than our non-writing fellows. To be perfectly frank, these are not qualities I would have ever expected to be found in someone who’s good in bed. I associate them more with the lawyers and accountants up above- spontaneity, or the lack of it, is to me always a sign of good juju.
But as it turns out the psychology of writing is similar to the psychology of good sex. Perhaps the defining characteristic of a great lover, across many of the studies that have been performed, is that a great lover is someone who puts the other person above themselves.
I do that all the time! I mean, sure, I call it connecting with the audience, but the idea’s the same.
And that goes for many of the other qualities about us. Observant? We sure are. We need to know what makes our characters tick, and because of that we are born people watchers. We’ve trained ourselves to pick up on little responses more quickly than other people – subtle responses that may have been otherwise overlooked by someone else not of the writing mentality.
Focused and analytical? You bet. I can speak from experience on this one – in everything I do, both public and private, I’m constantly trying to improve my game. I don’t just want my audience to be satisfied – I want them to come back for the sequels.
Dedicated and introverted? Sounds like a recipe for boredom. But actually, it means we’re not on the prowl for someone new – when we’ve found someone we love, we’re giving them all our energy and passion, not always looking for someone else to put in our back pocket. When you’re getting some of us, you know you’re getting all of us.
So okay. I grant you that writers have not traditionally been lumped in the sexy category. And the qualities that we normally possess aren’t qualities one might normally associate with sexiness or a great romp in the sack.
But as it turns out? We just might be the greatest lovers you’ve ever had. We had studies about how creative people do a better – now I think it’s time to revise and refine that study. I think, in the interest of science, we need to do a study on writers.
So we just might be the greatest lovers you’ve ever had.
Because I think when two writers do it it’s probably pretty mind blowing.
So are you a writer? Go out there, be confident: you’ve got all the recipes for success in love! Even if you don’t think you do.
And if you know a writer? Well, let them know they’ve got all the ingredients for a great love life.
(Or just try them out yourself)